A Tory Lord has passed a bill that would allow English and Scottish football fans to get “properly on the lash” at this Summer’s Euros.
Euros Kicks off This Summer
As the highly anticipated Euros tournament kicks off this summer, one Tory Lord made a bizarre statement in the House of Lords regarding a new law.
Britain’s Drinking Culture
The men’s football tournament is synonymous with Britain’s pub culture, with millions of hopeful Brits likely to drink the pubs dry.
Tories Make Surprise Summer Announcement
One aspect of society that football isn’t synonymous with is politics, but this year that’s all changed after a surprise announcement from the Tories.
Political Clash With Sporting Summer
Prime Minister Rishi Sunak announced a general election for the 4th of July, meaning that it will clash with a number of sporting events.
Tories Last Push for Summer Law
The events include some of the most prominent in British culture, such as the Euros and Wimbledon, causing the Tories to push for one last law before Parliament shuts down.
Good News for Football Fans
The law passed will allow British pubs to stay open later in the event that a UK national team makes the semi-finals and/or final of the Euros.
An Extra Hour of Drinking
Pubs will now be licensed to sell alcohol right until 1am on the night of the matches, allowing fans an extra hour of celebration.
England and Scotland Make the Cut
Both the England and Scotland national teams qualified for the Euros this Summer, with Wales narrowly missing out at the hands of Ukraine.
Tory Lord’s Humorous Comment
As the bill was being passed in the House of Lords, one Tory Lord, Lord Sharpe of Epsom, made the comment that sent the House into a rare fit of laughter.
Football Fans’ Chance to Booze
Lord Sharpe suggested that the new law gave football fans across the country a chance to get properly drunk this summer.
Fans to Get “Properly on the Lash”
Lord Sharpe insisted that the law would allow fans to get “properly on the lash” while enjoying their teams’ victory or drowning in their sorrows.
Lord’s Anticipation for Summer of Heavy Drinking
Speaking to the House, Lord Sharpe said it brought him “particular pleasure” to announce the new law as the anticipation for the Summer heats up.
A Lord’s Rare Opportunity
“So much of the business at the Home Offices is difficult, so it gives me particular pleasure that my last outing basically enables people to get properly on the lash,” Lord Sharpe said.
Sunak’s Election Campaign
Prime Minister Rishi Sunak, a keen fan of cricket and Southampton Football Club, may well be too busy campaigning to enjoy an extra couple of hours in the boozer on July 4th.
Polls Predict Landslide
The Prime Minister’s Conservative Party are sitting 30 points behind Labour in the polls, showing a potential landslide defeat is on the cards.
Scottish Parents as a Factor
The date of the election has the potential to enrage Scottish sports fans and parents as their kids break up for the holidays the week before the election, although English schools do not.
Holding back the Holiday
This means that if they wanted to cast a vote, they would have to hold back any plans for a Summer holiday with their families, whereas English families would not have to worry.
SNP MP Hits Out
One SNP MP spoke of the annoyance for his country and its residents as the election was announced in the middle of the school holidays.
Summer Election “Final Insult” on Scotland
Pete Wishart said, “A Scottish school summer holiday election is the final insult this Tory Government can impose on Scotland.”
A Shining Light
The new law can be seen as one shining light after the election announcement that disrupted so many plans this Summer.
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The post Bottoms Up! Tory Bill Unleashes a Summer of Booze-Fuelled Freedom first appeared on Edge Media.
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Oscar Davies, an expert in US and UK politics and sports, is renowned for his sharp and engaging writing style, appealing to a broad spectrum of readers.